Saturday, September 6, 2008

I LOVE these people!

I've had some sweet feelings today that I wanted to record. Today wasn't an extra-ordinary day by any means, but there were some moments of the day when I felt so grateful to be connected to all of the people in my little family that I just might burst.

The day started with Joseph waking up at 4:00 a.m. to go on a morning bike ride. No, he typically doesn't ride that early in the morning, but this morning, he made an exception because he had volunteered to do a precinct walk for the Protect Marriage campaign. He wasn't necessarily looking forward to doing the walk, knocking door to door, but our prophet has asked that all the members of our church put forth their "best efforts" in this cause. We believe in the cause, but still, it's not easy to go door to door speaking and informing people about such a controversial topic.

On his ride, his tires blew out and so he had to take off his bike shoes and run in his socks toward his car until someone finally picked him up and gave him a ride back to his car. He showered quickly when he arrived home and headed for the church, a little late, to join the rest of the group. Because he was late, he had to do the walk on his own, rather than with a partner, something I think would have been very hard, but I'm glad that he did it (even in the 95+ degree heat) He would have preferred to go with someone else, but that wasn't an option, so he just went to work. He received all sorts of responses and reactions from people, but for the most part, things went well.

It meant alot to me that he would do this. Not just to support our Church, but I felt like he was taking a stand to protect our family and our posterity. We don't know how long we will live in California. It could be a few years, it could be many years, but I hope the efforts of all who have worked so hard will be fruitful. This whole campaign has stirred alot of emotion in me. I've had some sleepless nights thinking about the subject and have been brought to tears during the day thinking about the effect it could have on our children in years to come. I'm glad he took the time to do it.

When he arrived home, we started to think about a family activity to do this afternoon. While we were brainstorming the stake primary president called and asked if Brynn would come to a stake primary choir practice for Stake Conference. They had originally asked for 8-11 year olds, but she lives down the street from us and thought Brynn could handle it. Joseph wasn't crazy about the idea, because he wanted to go play, and Brynn did NOT want to go sing. I felt like she should, so I tried to persuade her to do it. It turned into a big fiasco with her crying about how scared she would be to sing in front of others because the lights would be on in the chapel and she prefers to perform with the lights out so that she can't see the audience......and on and on and on. I finally told her it was her choice, if she didn't want to do it, I wasn't going to make her. She decided on her own that she wanted to and we headed to the Stake Center.

When we got there, I had the best feeling come over me. It's that feeling of knowing you are where you are supposed to be right at that moment in time. I think that the bitterness of the struggle to get her there, made it all the more powerful. I get it everytime I question whether or not I should go to that extra adult session of stake conference, or some other meeting that I am begrudging. Sometimes I get so caught up in completing all of the little tasks of everyday life that I don't take time to really feel the spirit, and I don't realize just how much I am in need of that boost, until I actually get it.

When we arrived, I realized the primary kids were preparing to sing for the prelude music before the general session of Stake Conference, so they had quite a few songs they were going to practice. They started out with all four verses of I Am a Child of God and I lost it. Brynn looked down at me, instead of at the chorister, and every time she made eye contact she would break out in a huge smile. I cried and cried, but tried to hide it the best I could. They then went on to sing some of my favorite primary songs....I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus, Families Can Be Together Forever, I Love to See the Temple, When I'm Baptized, I Know My Father Lives, A Child's Prayer, I'll Follow Him in Faith, We'll Bring the World His Truth as well as a few others I can't remember right now. So I just sat there wiping away the tears, feeling the emotion of each song and hearing these sweet little kids sing so beautifully. Brynn sang her little heart out, and it was cute to hear her voice above some of the others. I could tell she was really enjoying herself and she was glad that she had decided to be there.

By they were ready for a little break, I had gotten a hold of myself, and I went with Brynn to the restroom and to get a drink. I gave her hand a squeeze and told her that her singing made me cry happy and grateful tears because it was so beautiful. She was very amused and said, "It did? I couldn't tell you were crying from up there." It was such a gift to be able to take time out on a hard working Saturday to feel those kind of feelings.

I am grateful for my little family. They bring me tremendous happiness. As I sat and listened to Brynn sing about important gospel truths, and I thought about how Joseph had put forth his "best efforts" this morning it filled me with the hope that all of our children will come to know the truth the words in these sweet songs and it also filled me with the desire to do my best to teach them about those truths. I am grateful for the reminders to do and be a little better. I have a long way to go to get it all right, and sometimes, the task really scares me, but I'm glad to be a wife and mother.

4 comments:

TiAnn said...

Amy, you have such a sweet wonderful family. I love reading your blog and I actually feel uplifted a lot of the time after I've read your posts, thanks. I tagged you on my blog.

paul said...

sorry about the 'blow out' joe. that sounds awful...no tubes? are the tires shot? did you go down with the blow out?

great work and dedication in heading out at 4 am for a bike ride. i'm getting very excited for our ride in a few weeks.

joe has heard my thoughts on the campaign for prop 8.

i had similar feelings about primary songs when michael came in with the primary kids to sing about families before the combined 3rd hour pep talk about prop 8. michael's smile and voice projecting to the back where i stood was heartwarming. it has been fun to feel emotions i didn't think i could experience before becoming a husband and father.

paul said...

and amy: 7 weeks and 5 days. how exciting and how close!

Starnes fam said...

What a wonderful post. Thanks for sharing that special experience.